I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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