i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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