everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
