I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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