i can't believe i had my finger in that
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
