you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
