i don't plan on having that self control this summer
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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