I will die if light touches me.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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