Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
