How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
My cat gives me a boner
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
