Can Purell be used as lube?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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