The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I just want nice things and good sex
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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