Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
i now understand why vodka
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
