Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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