Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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