have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
