i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
