you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
