Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
