I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
