All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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