so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
