we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
