You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
