"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
