everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
We need to get me chipped asap
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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