My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
