school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
