I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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