i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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