He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
you had me at cake vodka
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
