We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
