I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
