Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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