what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
