No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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