Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize