dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
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