It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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