I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
