So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
