I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
