I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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