watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Randomize
