And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
