No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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