people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
