i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
