Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
