If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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